We’re losing at Risk, and it Sucks.
McCain has been attacking Obama for opposing “The Surge” back in 2006, and he’s scoring some political points with the issue. Obama still won’t say it was a good idea, even though it seems to have been relatively successful. I couldn’t figure out why, but then Russia invades Georgia, and I’m starting to see Obama’s point. The surge may have worked, but it cost us our entire military – and now we’re stuck twiddling our thumbs as Russia runs over a country. It’s scary. Didn’t these guys in the White House learn the basic lessons of Risk? They’re not even operating at an eighth grade level!
(To those who are unfamiliar with the game: my apologies, this ain’t gonna make a lotta sense…)
Have you ever been invading some two-bit territory like Siam with a massive army, and the stupid little twerp of a country keeps beating you on the dice rolls? You start to get annoyed at the game, and the audacity of a country like Siam for confronting your Eastern Army, so you just keep rolling and rolling ’til you take them out. Meanwhile, the other players are sitting around watching you fight that loser who camped out in Australia while they quietly consolidate power. Maybe you finally beat Siam, and manage to take over Australia as well, but when you turn around, you realize that everyone else has fortified their borders, and then they sweep in and massacre you. All of a sudden you’re the dumbass who’s stuck in Australia and once everyone else battles it out, you’re easy pickings.
Well at this point we’ve been pouring troops into Siam for five years and I’m starting to get worried about the other players.
Of course, any mention of Risk deserves a shout out to that brilliant Juan original from the old days…
And after the jump – more on how the Georgia conflict could be the beginning of something pretty bad…
A few months ago, I was at a bar and got into a long conversation with a Wall Street commodities trader about the world economy. He told me to watch out for Russia, because while no one in the US has been paying attention, Russia has assumed control of a lions share of the energy supply to Western Europe. Their only problem now is that they have to run pipelines through former Eastern Bloc countries like Georgia and Ukraine to get it there. So, lo and behold, there’s an uprising among ethnic Russians in the Eastern Georgian Provinces, and invasion here we come.
Now Bush is off in China for the Olympics, our military is inextricably bogged down in the Middle East, and Russia can pretty much ignore anything we say. Apparently, they’ve been telling us that they’re withdrawing, and then just continuing along their merry way to the capital, looting and raping all the while. This is not a military action. This is an occupying force. They have started ethnic cleansing in the northern provinces. They’re taking over. And incidentally, Southern Georgia is the proposed site for the Trans-Caspian pipeline that Russia wants to build to get natural gas to Western Europe. Its been stuck in a political mess for years…
Oh, and American corporation Bechtel is slated to build it.
And then there’s McCain, yelling and screaming about how we need to “confront Russia” head on! With what? Cheney’s hunting rifle? He seems to be totally deluded about our preparedness for war on a second front. And he’s supposed to be the military guy…
I think Obama needs to attack him head on with this one – appeal to Americans’ patriotism by saying that these dumbasses got us into a bad situation in the world. Now we’ve got Russia to deal with again – that country Reagan defeated, remember? The guys Reagan left behind have screwed it up, and we need to get back on our feet again. No knock to Reagan, but these guys have gone too far. McCain’s war, and his surge, just pissed away the finest military in the world.
“No knock to Reagan”?
“No knock to Reagan”?
The attack on Georgia is terrible. The ethnic cleansing is terrible.
If the struggle is once again about pipelines and oil in the end though – it seems like something every giant country does. Once the wars and tribulations are over. The larger country has won then they can start to make amends… but they’ll never give back what they took unlawfully.
It’s how the United States was made. Warfare continues in regions until the dust settles on the victor, and that victor needs to know that it can trade with the other great powers in the world.
If there are no shining examples of someone that did it otherwise throughout history how can we expect Russia to be any different than we were hundreds of years ago?
People say we should learn from history, but the only thing we seem to be able to learn is understanding about how others will react in similar situations we’ve already been through.
If we as a global society want to commit to change we should stop having wars over our natural resources. I know, I know – impossible and naive.
Hell someone ought to be.
The attack on Georgia is terrible. The ethnic cleansing is terrible.
If the struggle is once again about pipelines and oil in the end though – it seems like something every giant country does. Once the wars and tribulations are over. The larger country has won then they can start to make amends… but they’ll never give back what they took unlawfully.
It’s how the United States was made. Warfare continues in regions until the dust settles on the victor, and that victor needs to know that it can trade with the other great powers in the world.
If there are no shining examples of someone that did it otherwise throughout history how can we expect Russia to be any different than we were hundreds of years ago?
People say we should learn from history, but the only thing we seem to be able to learn is understanding about how others will react in similar situations we’ve already been through.
If we as a global society want to commit to change we should stop having wars over our natural resources. I know, I know – impossible and naive.
Hell someone ought to be.
There’s an Op-Ed in the NY Times by our old friend Mr. Gorbachev. It tells the story from Russia’s perspective – and it’s worth a read:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/08/20/opinion/20gorbachev.html?hp
I definitely respect a guy like Gorbachev – the hardest thing to do as a world leader is admit that you’re system doesn’t work and change it. But come on- does he really believe that Russia felt legitimately threatened?
Still, the whole expansion of NATO thing is an interesting point – maybe we should have been a little more inclusive when Russia was still trying to find it’s way?
And I guess it should have been “no knock on Reagan”. Or maybe no disrespect to him… hmm – all of those are hard for me to write, but it seems like the Bush administration has taken the Conservative party so far off the beaten path that the Reagan brand has become comparatively unassailable. It’s sad when a bunch of guys who secretly sold weapons to Iran to fund killers in Nicaragua can look responsible compared to what we’ve got now…
If Russia concentrates their main cavalry force in Irkutsk and leaves a contingent of artillery in Kamchatka, the United States will have no choice but to consolidate its infantry in Ural.
Fair enough… I just got whiplash, hearing respect for the Gipper when I’ve heard you argue so vehemently against his trickle-down economics. But, as you say, small potatoes compared to the current administration’s mash.
On Juan’s point, we can’t deny the hypocrisy of any U.S. involvement on an international scale, unless we have absolutely no economic stake (in which case, as has been proven in any number of African crises, intervention is unprofitable and sadly unlikely). So it doesn’t make sense to think about intervention righteously… we need to think about it strategically. Russia is breaking the agreed-upon international code of conduct in order to get ahead (and, what’s worse, breaking more than a few eggs as they make their omelet). Clearly SOMEONE should be within their rights to set this straight, and that should be the UN’s job. I know that august body doesn’t have a great track record of punishing bullies… but we’re pretty damn inconsistent ourselves. And, as you say, our RISK armies are overextended.
Not to be callous about international affairs, but this whole conflict comes at an insane time for the election. I have a perception of Barack Obama as a particularly inwards-looking candidate. Do you think that’s going to hurt him or help him? Are we more afraid of confronting Russia, or of leaving it to others to do so?
And sorry for the onslaught of food metaphors. I must be hungry.
Fair enough… I just got whiplash, hearing respect for the Gipper when I’ve heard you argue so vehemently against his trickle-down economics. But, as you say, small potatoes compared to the current administration’s mash.
On Juan’s point, we can’t deny the hypocrisy of any U.S. involvement on an international scale, unless we have absolutely no economic stake (in which case, as has been proven in any number of African crises, intervention is unprofitable and sadly unlikely). So it doesn’t make sense to think about intervention righteously… we need to think about it strategically. Russia is breaking the agreed-upon international code of conduct in order to get ahead (and, what’s worse, breaking more than a few eggs as they make their omelet). Clearly SOMEONE should be within their rights to set this straight, and that should be the UN’s job. I know that august body doesn’t have a great track record of punishing bullies… but we’re pretty damn inconsistent ourselves. And, as you say, our RISK armies are overextended.
Not to be callous about international affairs, but this whole conflict comes at an insane time for the election. I have a perception of Barack Obama as a particularly inwards-looking candidate. Do you think that’s going to hurt him or help him? Are we more afraid of confronting Russia, or of leaving it to others to do so?
And sorry for the onslaught of food metaphors. I must be hungry.