5UP3R M4R10 – Top Ten Hacked Mario Levels

This is only my second Mario-related post? Man, I thought I was doing service to my fixation… but apparently I’ve been slacking.

Unreality has an amazing top ten list of user-made levels that range from bizarre to painful to jaw-droppingly awesome. Half of me wishes I’d put this monster together myself… the other, significantly larger half is glad someone else sorted through the coal to find a few dirty, glittering gems.

My top three picks of their crop below.

The only way to beat this level is to never touch the controller… but I don’t think I could do it. Just watching those shells fly makes my thumbs twitch.

Witness Mario splitting into a being of endless possibility. Here’s a short list of things I would do with this incredible power: 1) Go basejumping 2) Go speed dating 3) Write a kickass comic book about myself.

and finally WTF HOW ARE YOU DOING THAT!?!!?!!! I’m pretty sure this perversion of nature is both real and the inspiration for Smash Brothers. If you’re getting bored, skip to the two minute mark for even greater insanity, set to even worse music.

Just for good measure, here’s uno mas that hit a chord. Considering this Sisyphean epic is 23 minutes long, I can’t truly recommend it… but I included it because it is the universal unsung tale for anyone who grew up with Mario. What, you don’t like it? MAYBE THAT’S BECAUSE IT’S TOO TRUE TO YOUR LIFE? Or maybe it’s because of the fake Christopher Walken accent… the jury’s out.

Jamie Antonisse

I was born on a Tuesday.

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