Rent is too Damn High Party FTW

Last week I stumbled on one of most revolutionary political parties in New York.  It is called the Rent is too Damn High Party.  One look at the web page, and I was sold.  Jimmy McMillian (pictured above), a self avowed investigator and activist, is running for mayor of New York.  He will be officially on the ballot against Bloomberg and Thompson in November.  Here are the top ten reasons I think he is getting my vote.

1. He has the catchiest campaign songs I have ever heard.  If you went to his web page, you know what I talking about.  Listen here:[audio:http://rentistoodamnhigh.org/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderfiles/tookout.mp3] [audio:http://www.mcmillan09.org/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderfiles/westend.mp3]

2. Both of his web pages look like they are stuck in 1997.  Check the other one here.  Did you see all the animated GIFs and poorly compressed images?  This guy is grass roots.

3.  He has only one issue in his party platform.  It is this: “‘RENT Is Too Damn High‘ There is nothing else to talk about. Ablolutely nothing. Don’t get evicted from this City. Join our team and Fight Back.”

4. The state election board told Jimmy his party name has too many letters.  Jimmy responded that they could replace “too” with 2.  The board rejected this idea, and when Jimmy wouldn’t budge, they printed ballots with the “Rent is too High” as his party.  To make sure no one forgot his party name he has “Rent is too Damn High” tattooed on his left bicep.

5. Under the name Prince James McMillan, AKA Papa Smurf, he wrote a book called A Veteran For Life: Agent Orange.  He explains,”this Book was written in 2004 to help people understand how serious I am.”  Enough Said.

6. In 1993 when he was running for mayor under the name Jimmy Mack he was kidnapped, tied to a tree, and doused with gasoline.  His assailants made reference to Jimmy meddling in things he knew nothing about.  The police said it was a political attack after they found him tied to the tree.  He must have been onto something seriously good to warrant this type of action.

7. In 2005 he placed forth in the race for Mayor just behind the Conservative candidate.  He finish ahead of the Green Party, the Socialist Workers, and the Libertarian Party.

8. He wrote “How to Run for Public Office with Out Spending any Money Handbook.”  Bloomberg could save a million or two by reading that one.  As someone who doesn’t like big money politics, this is a important alternative.

9. He totally tricked out his silver Honda CRV to be his campaign-mobile.  I always liked CRVs, and I am tired of Roll Royce rolling politicos.  I would be more comfortable with a pimped CRV any day.

10. Do you see his chops?  I mean how can you not trust a guy with such amazing facial hair?  You can just tell he is a no nonsense politician who doesn’t give an F about the status quo.